Me, my friend David and our Mission Commander: Capt. Soggy Bottom

One the road again:  As a kid, being the son of a teacher, the summer meant two things: 1. a road trip, 2. that we would stop at EVERY “educational” spot that was even remotely on our way.  Over the years of summer vacations, my mom and I piled into our old VW bug and drove to just about every corner of the US (and bits of Canada) and like it or not she made sure that I was going to learn something. We visited civil war battle grounds, Indian mounts, Underground Railroad sites, replica pilgrim villages, natural wonders and museums of every type.. and I hated it.  Every once in a while I think she would throw in a zoo or Playland just to balance it out for me, which I’m sure she hated. 

How things change:  Now, of course, I love all of those places and am slowly revisiting them with joy as an adult.  The Atlanta Cyclorama and US Air Force Museum in particular are now among my two favorite places in the US to visit. And I never grow tired of them.  It’s funny to my mom, and the irony is not lost on me, that when I was actually at these places as a kid that I spent all my time rolling my eyes and looking at my (metaphorical) watch.  Now I wish I had more free time to make road trips to these places, and, of course, take my son with me.

The final frontier:  One of those places on the revisit-list was Kennedy Space Center.  My mom and I apparently went there, but I was probably 2 and have no memory of it.  So a few months ago when my wife was out of town for a week on a business trip, I loaded my son in the car and drove to Florida.  One of my best friends lives in New Smyrna Beach FL and another in Savanna GA, so it seemed like a nice loop to visit the beach in Florida and then swing back through Savanna on our way home to Atlanta. 

I had high hopes for Kennedy Space Center, after all, I’m a bit of a space nerd, I grew up on the shuttle program and am a junkie for all of the space artifacts at the USAF Museum and Smithsonian Air and Space Museum.  Not to mention that since Kennedy Space Center is ground zero for the space program, I thought that they should be able to knock it out of the park!

How quickly my dreams were dashed when we walked into the park (which was $45 for adults and $35 for kids).  It was basically a collection of movie theaters, concession stands and gift shops (map of park).  What a letdown. We made the best of it, skipping all the theaters, and opting for the bus tour that went inside the launch areas.  This consisted of stopping at several old launch pads and driving by obsolete buildings from past missions, which was at least much better than what they set up in the Visitor Center.  But, in the end, it was not enough to save the day from being a real disappointment.

The only bright spot was a building inside the launch area, and the last stop on the bus tour, that had a full sized Saturn 5 rocket and a lot of artifacts on display.  Why this building has not been moved to the park is beyond me, but we really enjoyed it.

My son and me with a Saturn 5 rocket at Kennedy Space Center

Exit through the Gift Shop: Once back at the Visitor Complex, I thought we could at least find some special item that was only available at the Kennedy Space Center gift shop.  So, we reluctantly, went in.  And, much to our disappointment, it was full of the same “made in China” junk with the NASA logo pasted on it that you can get anywhere else.  Even worse was the fact that on the second floor was a REAL LIFE ASTRONAUT signing autographs.  Or should I say, available for signing autographs.  People just walked by him as the scurried around looking for that perfect shot glass or NASA back scratcher as he just sat at his little card table full of head shots and books.  It was so depressing that I didn’t know how to react.  I wanted to stop and talk to him, show a little respect despite the fact that I was not familiar with him personally, but it was just too depressing.

I thought, you know what would make me feel better? 

A picture of a “Rocket” in my pocket!

It’s not the amount of solid rocket fuel, it’s the number of stages!

In the end, I bought my son a stuffed bear in a Apollo era suit and a plastic plate with some NASA images on it.  The funny part is, that when I got home I found that the plate had a crack in it.  Oh NASA..

Pay Phone outside the Kennedy Space Center Visitor Complex

The final  countdown: Perhaps those in charge of the Kennedy Space Center Visitor Complex have done extensive focus group testing that show people want Imax movies (that they can see at any other Imax theater) and Dippin’ Dots, or giant turkey legs (I wasn’t sure what the space tie-in was with those) and not actual space artifacts.  Maybe this same research shows that nobody cares about the pioneering days of the space program (since it got 3 rooms, 1 of which was pop culture items from the 60’s) but somehow I doubt that.

The fact that we could send humans into space and to the moon in such a short time span using less technology than is in each of our cell phones is CRAZY!  The solutions the engineers and designers came up with to solve new and mysteriously unknown problems is awe inspiring. So why the hell wouldn’t you want to celebrate that at your own museum? 

I guess it’s left to nerds like me to teach our kids about these brave and brilliant teams of men and women who inspired a nation, and the world?  Sadly, it seems all of their innovation and hard work is just as obsolete and uninteresting as the payphone made in its image.